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Sunday, February 7th, 2010
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5:02 pm - Just Dropping by to Say:
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Fuck the Superbowl. Also, fuck the exorbitant amount of money spent on its commercials. While I'm at it, fuck Prefabricated Notions of Romance Day as well. You know precisely where you can shove those chalky hearts and cheap stuffed animals, Hallmark.
( Taste the Mundane Rambling )
In other news, aren't distractions great?
I've finally read Good Omens by Neil Gaiman and Terry Prachett. I loved reading about how the two authors collaborated on the book almost as much as I enjoyed the book itself. I've often thought about collaborating with a creative friend on a project, but never made a serious effort. It seems like you need to establish a special rhythm & rapport for it to work at all.
We are proud to report that we have successfully spread the infectious love of Deadpool to our significant other. He grows on you like a wonderful, snarky cancer, that one (Deadpool, not the SO). The more I can talk to my boyfriend about comics, the better I say. It feels deliciously special & nerdy, like when I talk to ![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) yaaurens about Doctor Who.
I posted a new story over at un_sinn777. It's short.
Still can't sleep.
current mood:  ?
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| Friday, February 5th, 2010
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12:17 am - Maybe
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| Sunday, January 31st, 2010
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4:01 am - !@#$%*
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| Wednesday, December 23rd, 2009
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4:05 pm - A Question for Those Who Create:
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I Don't Feel Gimmicky or Christmassy, so . . . .
forget about naughty and nice for now. Hell, it is my blog after all, and very few people read it. I have recently been thinking about creativity, artistic endeavors, what makes people create and what stops people from creating anything at all when they would like to. This question is directed at anyone and everyone who tries their hand at art, whether it is music, drawing, writing, filming, cartooning, scrapbooking, flower-arranging, dancing, making fan films for YouTube, whatever floats your creative boat.
1. What is your No.1 inspiration to create?
2. Do you collaborate with other artists? If you do not, would you given the chance? Why or why not?
3. Describe your No.1 "block" that prevents you from creating when you know you can. Also: What are your methods for getting through the block back to a place where you can create again?
4. List 3 other artists, film-makers, musicians, performers, etc. whose work you admire.
current mood:  curious
current music: Rammstein, "Roter Sand"
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| Saturday, December 12th, 2009
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11:08 pm - Of Naughty and Nice
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Some people do holiday blogs, so I thought I might as well do my half-assed version here! Hooray!yaaurens dos the 12 Blogs of Christmas, God bless her soul. I'll do something much simpler, much lazier, and much more Betsy.
From now till Christmas, I'll post something either naughty or nice. Since this is the Internet, nice things will be tough to find, but I'll try, gorram it.
I should start out with one naughty thing and one nice thing.
Let's see . . . naughty . . . oh yea! (That didn't take long at all)
I have *finally* purchased "Libe ist fuer alle da," Rammstein's new album, and it was so awesome that I had to change my underpants after listening to it. Really, it's that good. Though I still think their single was a stupid choice to represent the album as a whole. So far my favorites are "Rammlied," "Haifisch," and "Fruhling in Paris" (beautiful!) and "Donakinder" (also gorgeous). I was all proud of myself because I got the 2 disc Special Edition, but it turns out that Rammstein has an even more special Deluxe Edition out just in time for Christmas!
And here it is!
Just keep scrolling down, you'll see it. That's right, a lovely aluminium case with cutlery, handcuffs, lubricant, and six dildos that may or may not be meant to represent the band members (ha! "members") themselves. If this is the case, certainly no one can accuse Rammstein of having poor self-esteem. Oh, those wacky Germans! God bless 'em. Till's voice is still awesome and powerful as ever, and it's good to see them trying new sounds. Only the titular song of the album sounded a bit too much like their older stuff.
Ok, something nice . . . ::think, think:: . . . Nice . . .
Here is a recipe for awesome sugar cookies that you don't have to chill in the fridge. You can't cut them into shapes, but you can roll the dough in green and red sugar and they will look awesome.
Ingredients
* 3/4 cup butter, softened
* 1 cup vegetable oil
* 1 cup confectioners' sugar
* 1 cup white sugar
* 2 eggs
* 1 teaspoon vanilla extract
* 1 1/2 teaspoons lemon extract
* 4 cups all-purpose flour
* 1 teaspoon cream of tartar
* 1 teaspoon baking soda
* 1 teaspoon salt
* 1/2 cup white sugar for decoration
Directions
1. Preheat the oven to 375 degrees F (190 degrees C). Sift together the flour, cream of tartar, baking soda and salt; set aside.
2. In a large bowl, cream together the butter, oil, confectioners' sugar and white sugar until well blended. Stir in the eggs, vanilla and lemon extracts. Gradually mix in the dry ingredients until well blended. Roll the dough into walnut sized balls. Place the cookies 2 inches apart onto the cookie sheet. Flatten cookies to 1/8 inch thickness using the bottom of a glass dipped in sugar. Colored sugar may be used if you do not plan to frost cookies later.
3. Bake for 9 to 12 minutes in the preheated oven, or until the edges are golden brown. Allow cookies to cool on baking sheet for 5 minutes before removing to a wire rack to cool completely.
taken from allrecipes.com
current mood: Yarp
current music: Rammstein, "Haifisch"
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| Wednesday, December 9th, 2009
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8:49 pm - I'll Never be Ready
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I'm wondering about the future, and the interim that awaits. I'm curious and frightened, I don't think there will be work for me, I'm frightened that there will be work for me and I won't be prepared for it, scared that something else will come up and get in my way . . . so much is uncertain.
I must go against my nature and act intolerant and angry often, even when I do not feel it, because it lets other humans know where my boundaries lie, and that I will be shit upon no longer. Let's be honest, I've spent the majority of my life agreeing with other people whether or not it was good for me, and giving in so that people would be pleased with me. Such behavior is no longer an option (certainly not with high school students).
Those of us raised without spines must work hard to grow our own. Uncertainly we build the staircase as we go, and fall often.
I am a failure, yes. But I am also crawling upward to success. I just read a description of a snail moving slowly up Mount Fuji, and I think the metaphor is apt.
There is so much to improve, such time that has been wasted, and all around me uncertainty, fear, loathing, failure, poverty, pregnancy, soul-sucking relationships . . . all of the evil traps that human existence has to offer. The world is a terrifying place.
I will never be ready for it.
Some women love to plan perfect white weddings. I see no reason to veil the vision of a future with gauze, sheath it in white silk (false innocence!), and perform a perfect pageant for a day. There is no perfection in life, and I see no reason to pretend that there will be. My future will be rocky, a bumpy road, full of imperfection. There will be disappointment, sadness, pain, tears, and never enough money. But the point is, two people can make a promise to work through it together. And there is beauty in that struggle, in the place where we all are right now, that place that is not where we want to be but on the way to where we will arrive. The fact that we can strive together, maintain friendships, keep a loving relationship throughout; that is beautiful. (Obligatory Quote: "No one in the world ever gets what they want, and that is beautiful. Everybody dies frustrated inside and that is beautiful.")
I have made no solid plans or binding agreements, and I am ready for nothing, yet anything can happen. I feel so young, but too old to be protected from anything any longer. I see suffering, depression, and stagnation all around me. I am grateful, so very grateful, to all the people I love who have helped me move forward in life.
current mood: Awe
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7:43 pm - Watch out for the
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| Monday, November 16th, 2009
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5:00 pm - This is it, Folks
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I turned in the PACT. Do I feel relieved? No, just ill in the pit of my stomach, that's all. I don't think its' good enough.
The time for fucking around is over, my friends. My full time teaching two weeks begins tomorrow!
I've got to grab those Juniors by the neck and throttle them until they love American literature, dammit!
. . . and there are awesome things happening like This happening that I can't go to!
That's all I have time to type. I'm running on 1 hour of sleep, wired as all hell, and must eat something now before planning lessons on American Romantic authors (Hawthone and Irving and Poe! Oh My!) and freakin' Romeo & Juliet.
current mood: Crazy Wired Nutso
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| Friday, November 13th, 2009
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7:03 pm - I Will Now Punch the World in the Face!
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I wish. It really deserves it for being such a bastard. Particularly that portion of the world dedicated to designing the PACT assessment. But I've already detailed what I wish would happen to those people on my Facebook. Blargh. Epic Technology Struggle seems to be over (the scanning and video file converting), and now I must finish writing and organizing the damn thing. This is so very hideous, I hardly know where I am right now. The lighting is vaguely yellow & I can hear traffic. Perhaps I have become a bum living underneath a highway overpass (you know, like in the Maxx). If that is the case, I dearly hope the PACT is a product of some fevered, drug-induced delusion, and I am not in fact responsible for any of this, but soaking pleasantly in a pile of my own filth. Yes.
Oh, right. You people who are my friends & also happen to be artists, listen up. My fave nerd site Topless Robot is having a contest for a new logo. NO, it isn't meant to be pornographic, you pervs, just nerdy. Very nerdy. Anywho, once I read about the contest I thought of you, my artsy friends who actually have a real sense of style & design I can never hope to achieve in my wildest dreams (damn you!).
I seem to be venting all my frustrations online and at the men in my life. My father & boyfriend get to deal with Obnoxious Stressed Bitch until this ordeal is done. Then I will revert back to normal Stressed and Insanely Worried status.
current mood:  stressed
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| Tuesday, November 10th, 2009
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11:47 pm - Life, Death, etc.
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Now it's getting hard to remember a time when people I knew weren't pregnant or dying. Wow, that sounds like the first line of some kind of angsty emo ballad. Anyway, another grandmother has died, not mine, (I am fresh out of grandparents) but Brent's. From the brief moments I spent with her, I know she was a dear lady in a difficult living situation. I hope she finally has sweet peace now.
The great beast PACT is still eating me alive, it's slow, painful digestive juices turning me to mush, starting with my brain and moving outwards. I spent 2 hours scanning documents today. I'm dreadfully out of shape, not eating very well, and popping caffeine pills every so often. Honestly, I don't know how else to get through all the crap I need to do right now and still have energy to teach lessons. The good news is that the little buggers seem genuinely interested in Romeo and Juliet. I'm certain their enthusiasm will dissolve the moment we actually start the play, but what the hell, it's fun for now. They get to make skits and act things out and yay.
You know what I've discovered? I like to make students suffer. It amuses me. Behold an example from last week:
Student X: I finished the homework, see.
Me: There wasn't any homework assigned
Student X (shocked): What! I wrote this entire paragraph for nothing!
Me: But that's wonderful! You can use that work for your independent novel project.
Student X (angry & resentful): I could've been leveling up in Call of Duty!
Me: But you leveled up in literature, that's awesome!
Student X (with a hurt & betrayed expression): No. No, it's not!
Ahahahaha . . . . well, it was funny at the time. Shut up. Don't judge me.
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| Saturday, October 31st, 2009
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5:42 pm - All Hallow's Eve
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| Sunday, October 25th, 2009
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7:17 am - In Two Weeks
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* My Grandmother has passed away. She was 96. Making it almost an entire century is pretty damn good in my opinion. But, as my SJ State supervisor told me, "loss is loss." My grandmother is gone and I can't get any of that time I should have spent with her back. None of you knew her, but I'll just say for the record that she loved bluebirds and pansies and really cheap sales. She was a tiny woman, but even at 95 able to walk up and down stairs. She ran a business with my grandpa John, who I never really knew because he was starting to decline even when I was a little girl. He didn't talk much. Grandma loved to drive, she called it "whizzing around in my little buggy." She would tell us how she used to ride a horse to school. She also liked to dance. This is a pretty sudden goodbye. It seemed as though she was doing alright in the nursing home, but she had stopped eating solid food. I guess her body was just shutting down.
* The PACT portfolio for my teaching credential has mutated into a monstrous beast. Every day I open up my e-mail to find that the requirements have been altered or added to, and I must back up and undo or adjust some progress I have made. I have had to omit most of my preferred material for the Poetry Unit in favor of PACT-friendly material. So I'm having them write and revise analytical paragraphs so that I will have an assessment on time for this thing, when I would have wanted to, you know teach more poetry first. Damn them, they pushed the final deadline for this to Nov. 16. And now they not only want the original requirements, but are demanding that this entire portfolio (40+ pages of lesson plans, material and commentary) on a disc ALONG WITH my 20 minutes of film footage. AND they want all my 20+ permission slips I had the students sign before filming SCANNED INDIVIDUALLY. And on the same disc! Look, I am technologically retarded and have no idea how to do this. So I must arrange for some sort of technological assistance in addition to organizing and writing my portfolio and planning and teaching my classes.
* Can you guess where I am on this Sunday morning? If you said Jamestown, North Dakota, you would be correct. I'm here for Grandma's funeral service. Flying back tomorrow after the service and teaching Tuesday afternoon. Thank God Mondays are short 40 minute periods. So I'm working on PACT on the plane, in the car, and now in a hotel lobby. I flew up by myself to meet my family, and I'm leaving them early to resume my teaching. Now I have to plan my lesson for Tuesday.
* Chaos must be tempered with something frivolous and fun: I went to the haunted corn maze in Hollister the night before my flight. Now that was fun. Also, Rammstein has a new album out: "Liebe ist für alle da" (Love is there for everyone).
That's all I've got. I really don't know if I can make it through this. I better stop thinking about it.
current mood:  ??!??
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| Saturday, October 10th, 2009
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3:18 pm - I <3 Lists! Top 10 Creepiest Monsters
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Yes, I've developed a list habit. It's only going to get worse, people.
This time, because it is October, I have complied a list of the 10 best monsters. By “best” I mean most creepy, haunting and unusual. These monsters break clichéd conventions and are, in their own way, beautiful. They display originality and artistry in their design and are often twisted, uncanny versions of human beings.
Warning: the content of these clips is seriously spooky with a moderate dose of gore. C’mon, you know you like it!
10. Carl Stargher from “The Cell”
Bear with me on this one. Despite the presence of Jennifer Lopez, this movie is visually, artistically stunning. Some of the scenes, like the one in the clip, are scary and beautiful, and that’s what I like the best in my monsters. Granted, Stargher is only a weird god/monster creature in his own mind, but that is where the majority of the movie takes place.
9. The Stop Motion Creatures from Tool videos
Tool has amazed, frightened, and inspired me in more ways than I can count. Often their videos do not directly represent what the song is about, but instead give the viewer strange visuals to interpret. The visuals just burn into your retinas. Try watching the video, closing your eyes, and not seeing the broken boy doll or the shiny black creature. Just try it!
8. Michael Myers from “Halloween”
Now, Michael is far down on this list simply because he resembles a normal human being, although it is clear from the number of times he’s “killed” Michael is something other than human. Whether he is a ghost, zombie, or fleshy regenerating cyborg is never established (at least not in the first two movies. If they ever spoil this, don’t tell me! I like Myers to be mysterious.) He is simply an unstoppable killing machine in a white Captain Kirk mask. Combine that with his theme music and you one stylishly chilling monster. (Is it me, or does this clip make him seem kind of sexy? It’s me isn’t it? I need help . . .
7. The Weeping Angels from “Blink”
These make the list because the concept is simple and terrifying. You can’t see the angels move, but they change position each time you blink, moving gradually closer until there is nothing you can do. Steven Moffat does a great job playing with our childhood fears. Here, statues come to life, and in a later episode, normal shadows are infested with invisible flesh eating alien life forms.
6. The Angel of Death from “Hellboy II”
Yes, I am a sucker for Guillermo Del Toro’s intricate monsters. This fellow is superb; I love the fact that he has eyes in his wings. In the clip you only get a couple glimpses of him, though.
5. The Gentlemen from “Hush”
Those silent rictus grins will forever haunt my dreams. I love their mute, flailing, straitjacket-clad henchmen, too. The Gentlemen are proof that what makes a successfully creepy monster is movement. The way these guys move is mesmerizing; you just can't look away. Even people who aren't Buffy fans can enjoy this. No one speaks in the episode, thus no one is subjected to bad acting.
( Here There be More Monsters )
current mood: Spoooky
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| Saturday, October 3rd, 2009
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8:09 pm - My Week: from Ghost Hunters to Gene Wilder Look-Alikes
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A week has gone by since my parents left for North Dakota. It's strange that the house is so empty. Things happen that wouldn't normally happen: I spend some time outside of my room, my boyfriend doesn't feel awkward when he visits, and my brother has random people over to look for ghosts.
Wait, what? Ghosts? What?
That's right. I came home Thursday night to see random people sitting around the dining room table. One guy was taking a picture every couple minutes, creating constant flashes that were unsettling. And then there was this chick making noises like a tortured chihuahua, her version of human laughter I guess. It was glaringly obvious she was as high as a kite, although my brother told me later "That's just how she is." Uh huh. Uh huh. They were trying to capture "orbs" on camera, like it was some kind of episode of Ghost Hunters International. At least Ghost Hunters can be amusing. This was just bizarre, uncomfortable, and dumb beyond all reason. Sweet lord. It was worse than the time my brother had a party and one of his friends drunkenly hit on me.
Earlier in the week: A freshmen child read the notes I wrote in the margins of his class notebook and gave me his stories to read. They are edited by his mom. I just about cried from all the cute. Looks like I'll be an active figure in the creative writing club on campus as well. Oh yes, and there is a child in one of my classes that bears an uncanny resemblance to Gene Wilder. I did not notice this at first, because he is very quiet and sits in the back. But then came the talk show assignment, in which students are interviewed as a character from one of the short stories we've read. This kid ROCKED as Montressor from "The Cask of Amontillado." Some serious theater potential here. His face lit up, he acted evil and conniving, and suddenly, as I was taking notes on the presentation, I began to think of Willy Wonka and Young Frankenstein . . . and it became difficult not to laugh. My master teacher agrees with me, we have a mini-Wilder in our midst.
The October Grind begins as I prepare for the insane teacher assessment known as the PACT. I must show in two 10 minute film clips that my teaching is without flaw and I deserve to be credentialed.
Other than that: can any of you recommend poems for young people to read? I'm starting a poetry unit and want to include poems that will generate good discussion. I have so many poems I'd like to include, but really I have to pick the best that will engage interest and provoke discussion.
current mood: Amused & Confused
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| Saturday, September 26th, 2009
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4:24 pm - I Need This!
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EEEE! They have made a Doctor Who comic with Plague Doctors in it! Two of my all-time favorite things! And it looks like the Plague Doctors will be spooky alien and/or robot thingies like the gas mask zombies in "The Empty Child." Is there any better villain for the Doctor than these guys (other than The Master of course)?
Plague Doctors vs. The Doctor = Superawesomebadassery!
Also makes me want to make a Plague Doctor mask for Halloween . . . a better one that the one I made year before last.
Also, here is a Plague Doctor because they are so awesome:
In other news, I got to see Murray do a hat trick last night. Everyone threw their hats onto the ice, which makes me glad I never wear hats. What if someone had chosen that evening to wear a particularly fine silk stovepipe? What a tragic loss that would be. Well, at least the hats go to charity.
In other news, I have essays to grade and I'm procrastinating. I just finished grading a crate full of notebooks, for crying out loud! Bah! Also, the school is starting a creative writing club, and hopefully I can get involved in that somehow.
I miss my friends! I feel antisocial and isolated again. I should at least be making the occasional movie/frozen yogurt outing, right? But I'm not. I suck.
And oh. Family. My 96 year old grandmother is in the hospital. She had fluid in her lungs and her kidneys even quit for a while. Mom & dad took a last minute trip to North Dakota to get her put into a nursing home. It's about time, really.
current mood:  restless
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| Sunday, September 13th, 2009
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8:49 pm - When it comes to Marvel/Disney . . .
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I think Batman's point of view is very wise.
But the whole thing still leaves a bad taste in my brain. Ah well. Until Ghost Rider gives out free cupcakes, make mine Mickey Mouse. Or something. Man, comic book lingo is really stupid.
current music: the improbable rain outside
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| Friday, September 11th, 2009
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5:54 pm - Today
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The lesson went well. They got into the opening exercise, contributed ideas, and they listened to me. I was babbling about Poe and they were all looking at me with their mouths shut, almost as though they were genuinely interested in what I had to say. And then, when the reading was over, they wrote quietly, for the most part.
I don't know if I'll ever have a day like this again, but I'm so very glad today happened the way it did. If only my supervisor could have seen . . .
current mood:  satisfied
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| Sunday, September 6th, 2009
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8:00 pm - BoredLizzie <3's Broken People: Top 9 Insane Protagonists
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The Best 9 Insane Protagonists from Comic Books, Television, and Movies
I can never express enough love for insane, mentally unbalanced protagonists. Their experiences are heightened in intensity and emotion. They are plunged into heights and depths normal folk only barely brush up against in their dreams. Here is my love-list of the best insane, unstable characters in television, movies and comic books.
My criteria: No real life characters or characters based on real life people. Folks like Hannibal Lecter are right out. No characters that have been used exclusively in horror films, mostly because such cases of insanity are thinly veiled excuses to kill hormonal teenagers. So, Leatherface and Freddy Kruger will not make the cut. I wanted characters whose insanity shapes their reality, draws the reader/viewer into their world, and whose actions make it clear that they are not right in the head.
( Click to Share the Insanity )
current mood:  crazy & geeky
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5:14 pm - Student Teacher Status Thus Far
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| Monday, August 31st, 2009
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10:20 pm - Disney done took mah Marvel Comics!
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Thanks, Disney. I was just enjoying Marvel again after a 14-year break. Now you come along and buy the company ! You now own another corner of my childhood, along with fairy tales and Alice's Adventures in Wonderland. And we all know how generous you were to those . . . how faithful to the original spirit of the stories. Good Christ. I know Marvel is a soul-less, godless corporate entity but I didn't realize they would sell themselves to you. (Okay, maybe I should have guessed.) Couldn't you leave the X-Men alone? I don't want to associate comics with you. At all. This just makes DC look better, really. They have Batman, Vertigo, Sandman, and NO Disney. But Marvel has the characters I loved when I was young, and has even enticed me recently with some new ones. Sigh. Will the characters and stories change?? Dunno. Marvel comics have been stuck in a male adolescent fantasy world for so long, maybe it won't even notice the difference. Just stay the hell away from Deadpool, unless he is committing mass genocide at Disneyland dressed as Cinderella with guns and grenades hidden up his skirt. You bet your ass he would be singing, too.
Please don't turn X Men into Pirates of the Carribean, prettify or soften them to appeal to a new, younger audience. You'll turn Gambit into an Emo scene kid, Rogue into Hannah Montana and Nightcrawler into something from Twilight.
See you at the Disney Store, kids! Excelsior!
We don't need no Disnification
We don't need no Mickey Mouse
No Micheal Eisner all up in Marvel
Hey! Disney! Leave us fans alone!
All in all you are all just whores in a mall
Superheroes at the Disney Store in the mall!
Hey! Stan Lee! Throw us fans a bone!
Hey! Disney! Leave Deadpool alone!
current mood: cranky
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